Music

Into the Wild!

I like Japanese porn. A lot of my friends aren’t into it because of the censorship.

Story by Rekstizzy - https://twitter.com/rekstizzy Cover Photo by Cameron Dennis

Rekstizzy is an up and coming MC out of Queens well known for his stage antics. He gave us a little insight into his thought process:

Aw man, God bless America.

I just copped this t-shirt with a cute dog on it. I’m going to wear it at my next show and when the crowd is hypnotized, I’ll lift the shirt, and it’ll be a gnarly set of man boobs where those puppy eyes were.

But that’s what happens. Some things you can’t unsee, bro.

I like Japanese porn. A lot of my friends aren’t into it because of the censorship. Private parts and any sort of penetration are blurred out because of government laws. I don’t mind it too much, but there was this one time, the shit really betrayed me. I usually download flicks based off their covers because I can’t understand the titles. So I download this one flick with some random chick because she had a nice rack. Turns out it was a tranny film. I first noticed something off about the voice, and then lo and behold I could see this dude’s package flopping around behind the mosaic blurs. I don’t have anything against trannies or tranny porn, but it was unsettling because I thought it was this, but it was that, you know?

Some things you can’t unsee, bro. And I know it bums a lot of people out. Maybe it’s a local news article about a grandma who died all alone, or maybe you’re just a teenage girl who can’t feel empathy on that level yet, but your boyfriend sent you a text that made you cry, and everyone knew you were crying because you shielded your eyes.

That’s why a lot of people, young and old, are checking out these images and YouTube videos of cute animals. And it’s not like one or two; it’s like two hundred to four hundred joints in one sitting. I’m not a scientist, but I would stand firmly by any research about endorphins and happy chemicals circulating through your brain from those images. Especially when they’re tagged with inner thoughts like “I Can Haz?”, that shit is a literal drug.

It’s all good, man.

But I would suggest mixing it up with something more substantial every now and then. I saw a scene in “Planet Earth” where these guys camped out for five days to get a glimpse of the elusive snow leopard. That’s breakfast, lunch, day and night, in the cold, just keeping your head down and crossing your fingers. Then, there it was. And not only was it there, it was all there, in its glory, chasing a mountain goat down, pouncing from rock to rock at breakneck speeds. I bet it was a beautiful thing for those guys. Like, a real “moment” moment…

And then the mountain lifts its shirt. Ha!

Whatever you say the album is on the way. Follow @Rekstizzy on Twitter and check out his site GUMSHIP.com.

One Response to “Into the Wild!”

  1. […] / Guest Posts The Hotbox – EP. 27 Ofive.tv – The Upcomers Feature Citizen Brooklyn – “Into the Wild” Mass Appeal – “Gangnam Style Explained” Angry Asian Man – Angry Reader of the […]