POV

Mother Dearest: Earth Day 2014

Listen up, ‘cause I’m only gonna say this once…

Story by Teo J. Babini - teo@citizenbrooklyn.com Photos by Alex Magi
Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Here’s how it goes: I love the novelty of every daily, weekly and monthly dedication as much as the next sap who writes a post about it on social media (Pi day? C’mon). It’s jus’ somethin’ to make one day different than the next, like lookin’ up the reason for the colors of the Empire State building on any given day, a welcome break from the caffeine and alcohol regulated monotony of life. If anything, it gives you an excuse to wear a certain pair of loosely themed underwear, or listen to a specific playlist you haven’t heard on the headphones in a while.

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Earth Day, though, is one of those touchy subjects, kinda like Valentine’s Day. See most single people hate V-day an’ jus’ use it as yet another excuse to get a little too day drunk, while most couples suffer through the anxiety inducing chaos that ensues when trying to figure out the right gift and make reservations. The conspiracy folks say it’s jus’ another Hallmark scam to increase consumerist demand, while the “elevated thinkers” tend to say why wait for V-Day, every day should be special, blah blah blah #datenight #perfectcouple #IMINARELATIONSHIPTOOANDTHISISSTILLREALLYANNOYING…

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Anyway, I’m all about celebrating love, an’ I don’t mind the reminder to do so, I just tend to delay the plans a bit to avoid the mess. But, back to Earth Day. Earth Day I kinda really do have an actual problem with. For starters, on the scale of real life importance, this should be bigger than New Years at this point, and yet more people seem to get excited about “National Crazy Sock Day” or whatever they come up with next. Priorities?

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Number two, I’m not being a pretentious hipster idiot when I say that it should be Earth Year, every year. And before u start rollin’ your eyes like: “This is prolly one of those guys who doesn’t drink bottled water or wear deodorant”, I have two words for you: F^(k Off. Also, open your iPhone stained eyes. No, I don’t have a garden on my roof, nor do I keep bees on it, nor do I ride a bike to work. But, guess what? I sure as shit recycle, I go out of my way to do it, and so should you and every other person who felt bad when their parents read them “The Giving Tree”. And, you are correct; I do not drink bottled water, goddamnit! Whenever it can be avoided. (Def wear deodorant though.)

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Finally, the kids. I understand the importance of instilling this concern in the youth, but we’re basically teaching them to love a planet who’s resources we’re gonna polish off before they even get a chance to sit with adults at the grown-ups table. Better yet, that very planet is gonna polish us off with an angry shrug, (insert natural disaster here). You ever seen “Mommie Dearest”? Well, imagine Mother Nature on the same tip, and think about that the next time you “celebrate” the Earth by posting a quote on your Facebook wall and calling it a Day.

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

Photo © Alex Magi

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